Thursday, July 22, 2010


I am not a perfect wife.

My husband is not a perfect husband.

Something I strive really hard NOT TO DO is complain about my husband.

I dislike that our culture - maybe our species - fuels women to get together and complain about their man. And do you know what happens when you point out all the naggilly annoyances of your husband? You draw attention to those "hotspots" that much more and you start to notice even more imperfections. It's a snowball that keeps getting bigger. It's a great way to grow apart.

People are not perfect. I am not perfect. Marriages aren't perfect either.

I get kinda irked that David frequently catches the edge of our hall rug with his foot and it gets flipped up and then stepped on. The rug is fairly new and getting destroyed at an alarming rate, because all the edges are curling upwards from my family of feet-draggers. It's really not a big deal, but I want him to step OVER that edge. One morning, I watched it happen, again, and I sighed about it, making some comment. He was leaving the house, and I went to leave right after him and I accidentally caught the edge, flipped it up and stepped on it. I had just complained at him for it and here I was doing the exact same thing. It was a great reminder that I have my own faults too. And David never points them out to me. Sigh.

There are days where I DO vent about my husband and appreciate sitting with a close friend and letting it all out. I'm not sure that it actually does any good, but I know that I make a conscious effort to mentally list all the great qualities about him right in the midst of feeling frustrated and I think that helps balance out a bad day.

So try and catch yourself before you say something critical about your spouse. I'm going to try harder not to.

1 comment:

  1. Good plan. :)

    It's much better, I think, to focus on the *good* stuff.

    But, sometimes a good vent is the best medicine. :D